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According to statistics, approximately one third of women have been sexually taken advantage of while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. The creators of the Global Drug Survey 2022 interviewed 120K people around the world and the result was really not encouraging. 29.3 percent of women have experienced such an incident, and approximately 8 percent admitted that it took place in the last 12 months.
On average, the situation develops in a similar way – a man offers a woman a drink, orders her more and more alcohol, and then takes advantage and, as we see from the statistics, this, alas, has had a tendency to increase lately. In turn, bartenders are generally just glad that customers are increasing their orders. However, there are also some good exceptions.
Like this bartender named Rise who, in her TikTok video, showed how she tries to read the body language and facial clues of her female clients in order to prevent men from getting women drunk and taking advantage of them. The video went viral with over 8M views, and many netizens praised Rise for her good idea.
Image credits: Martyn Smith (not the actual photo)
In her video, Rise staged her reaction to men who specifically order a double shot of tequila for the woman who came with them, hinting that they plan to get her drunk.
In this case, Rise winks at the client, pretends to pour tequila into a glass, and does it under the bar so that the man does not see her hands. Meanwhile, she pours clear water, pretends to be serving alcohol, and hands the glass to the woman.
“Men more than women are less likely to believe that being drunk affects one’s capacity to consent to sex,” state Dr. Anna Carline from LJMU and Dr. Clare Gunby from the University Of Leicester in their study evaluating a sexual consent campaign aimed at young men. “Non-consensual acts are perpetrated most frequently by an individual known to the victim.”
“Using the victim sexually after they had been drinking alcohol and were conscious but too intoxicated to give consent or stop what was happening is the most frequently used tactic,” say Dr. Carline and Dr. Gunby.
So Rise is really doing a good deed. However, not all commenters really agreed with this. One man even clarified that he gets charged for a double shot of tequila, and the woman ends up getting water when she really wanted some alcohol. To this, Rise noted that she always tries to read a woman’s body language, and wonders: “Is that what YOU want to drink?”
By the way, people in the comments also said that Rise is not alone in her actions. For example, someone said that one day their grandma took them to a bar and showed them a mini-fridge under the bar, where there were special glasses of water “just in case”. And other bartenders also decorate these glasses with a slice of lime for heightened effect.
As always, we’d like to know your feedback on this story, so now feel free to write your comments. If you too have worked as a bartender and done something similar, then please share your own tale. We suppose this would be really wholesome for anybody who plans to have a drink in the bar.
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Oleg has master's degree in Economics he got long time ago in a city far, far away. Oleg also worked as a university teacher, sports writer and a BDSM* specialist for several IT companies. After six years of making pub quizzez in Ukraine, Oleg joined Bored Panda team as a content creator. This panda (Pun? Duh!) is also a huge sports fan, being happy as a longtime member of WeDemBoys Community and Boston Celtics Nation as well. During his downtime from work and parenting with three kids (twin daughters and a baby son), Oleg enjoys reading JKR, JRRT, GRRM and other respective abbreviations. Also interested in history and graphic design (and the history of graphic design too)...
Saulė is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. In her free time she loves painting, embroidering and taking walks in nature.
To some of the commentors :it isn't automatic,she looks at the body language of the woman with the guy, the angel shots are reliant on the person being confident enough to ask or able to get away from the guy. FYI (at least according to my state's laws): if either parties are intoxicated in any way it is rape ,if both parties are intoxicated it is still classified as rape. Stop calling it nonconsensual sex , it is rape.
Louder for the people in the back. And the idiots who think this is ok.
this is what I was thinking while reading the comments. the bartender is reading a situation and then doing this, they aren't just giving water to every guy ordering for a girl
Upvote a hundred times for "Angel Shots!" We as bartenders and in the hospitality industry can usually tell when the $hit has hit the fan. The red flags fly so damned high... Thank you bartenders and servers for looking out for your people!
@hyde and seek, Wait, if both parties are intoxicated and it is classified as rape, then who raped whom? Genuine question.
Obviously the one who ignored that there is no consent.
Both parties are classified as the rapist since neither is capable of consent.
Yea, it went directly over dreamgirlpuffy whatever‘s head!
So your stance is we should be arresting drunk couples that have sex because neither can supposedly consent? So stupid. Here is am idea, how about people be accountable for THEIR actions. That includes how much you drink.
If they're both intoxicated then is it rape for the man as well? I doubt you would look at it that way
Yes it is rape for men as well. I would look at it that way ,you presume alone about me for someone who's never met me.
I love how one of the commenters was more concerned with paying double for a water shot and not at all concerned with getting a woman drunk to lower her inhibitions.
That was probably the guy who was ordering those tequila double shots.
I was this bartender back in 1980. A man asked me to give his date doubles for every drink he ordered. He was given the drink he asked for, hers was non-alcoholic. When she took the first sip, I looked her in the eyes. A quick moment of confusion, followed by understanding. We smiled. He got drunk, she left. Only happened once, still remember.
Good for you. You helped someone that night. I'm sure she remembers that.
Thank you, it was a long time ago. It surprised me in the moment, i acted on instinct, impulsively, rather than with careful thought. His attitude sickened me. You can't predict how you will act, I believe most of us would do as I did.
To some of the commentors :it isn't automatic,she looks at the body language of the woman with the guy, the angel shots are reliant on the person being confident enough to ask or able to get away from the guy. FYI (at least according to my state's laws): if either parties are intoxicated in any way it is rape ,if both parties are intoxicated it is still classified as rape. Stop calling it nonconsensual sex , it is rape.
Louder for the people in the back. And the idiots who think this is ok.
this is what I was thinking while reading the comments. the bartender is reading a situation and then doing this, they aren't just giving water to every guy ordering for a girl
Upvote a hundred times for "Angel Shots!" We as bartenders and in the hospitality industry can usually tell when the $hit has hit the fan. The red flags fly so damned high... Thank you bartenders and servers for looking out for your people!
@hyde and seek, Wait, if both parties are intoxicated and it is classified as rape, then who raped whom? Genuine question.
Obviously the one who ignored that there is no consent.
Both parties are classified as the rapist since neither is capable of consent.
Yea, it went directly over dreamgirlpuffy whatever‘s head!
So your stance is we should be arresting drunk couples that have sex because neither can supposedly consent? So stupid. Here is am idea, how about people be accountable for THEIR actions. That includes how much you drink.
If they're both intoxicated then is it rape for the man as well? I doubt you would look at it that way
Yes it is rape for men as well. I would look at it that way ,you presume alone about me for someone who's never met me.
I love how one of the commenters was more concerned with paying double for a water shot and not at all concerned with getting a woman drunk to lower her inhibitions.
That was probably the guy who was ordering those tequila double shots.
I was this bartender back in 1980. A man asked me to give his date doubles for every drink he ordered. He was given the drink he asked for, hers was non-alcoholic. When she took the first sip, I looked her in the eyes. A quick moment of confusion, followed by understanding. We smiled. He got drunk, she left. Only happened once, still remember.
Good for you. You helped someone that night. I'm sure she remembers that.
Thank you, it was a long time ago. It surprised me in the moment, i acted on instinct, impulsively, rather than with careful thought. His attitude sickened me. You can't predict how you will act, I believe most of us would do as I did.
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